People think I'm strong but really, underneath this shell lies two very different personalities. Ever wondered why you could never figure me out? That's because you're not seeing the two personalities as being separate from each other. One of them is tough, bitter, disillusioned, swears, and doesn't want anything to do with insufferable bloody idiots; The other one is innocent, forever hopeful, idealistic, loves fairytales and looks forward to finding the perfect man. Both of them know that the perfect man is: 1) NOT an idiot. 2) Enjoys and appreciates their sense of humour. 3) Can handle her mood swings. 4) Able to keep up with her or, better yet, be one step ahead of her sometimes.

Ben_Romans Kellie Bao_Ling Agnes Pei_Shi Joakim Jayne Zine Lee_Peng Spelling June Xi_Xi Jessica Min_Shen Lippy Jun_Yin

I finally told you what I really thought ... Not in a direct way but it's going to make you think about what I said. Even though I'm sure you are pretty confused about what I said, I'm glad I did finally reveal a little about how I felt about yyour attitude. I just don't think you should be treating me in this way. Sometimes you're so sweet to me, sometimes you sound just like a friend, nothing more and nothing less, and I can take that. What I can't STAND is you are always nicer in your messages but not as nice to me in person. I was a bit shocked and disappointed the first few times it happened. I remember always expecting you to say something more to me, something to give indication of what we had chatted about the other night but it never came, it didn't happen.
It's so silly. If you didn't want to have tea (I think it's best to refer to it as tea, it's the best substitute) with me, you could have just said so instead of avoiding my question with ridiculous excuses everytime! Did you really think I am THAT stupid? And yet, it was you who asked me whether you were included in the treat in the first place. Then you changed your tone when I reminded you about coming out to tea. "Isn't a home-baked cake more sincere and economical?", you said. Sure it is, but I doubt you would turn up for a slice even if I asked you to. Both the treat and the home-baked cake were offers opened to you but you turned down the first offer, who am I to say you won't turn the second one down as well? What a fucked up person indeed. You lead me on to think that you cared about me. "I want to know you better, or else how can I say that I care about you?". That was a lie, as well as everything else I thought we had. We didn't have anything. All I had was your lies. An illusion weaved by a scheming, no-good shit.
And to think I was upset to see you chatting happily with a group of girls on Friday and I pretended not to see you when you came downstairs... You certainly knew how to keep me pining and waiting alright.
And "I hope you don't mind... Let me give you a hug. I hope you will feel warm on this cold night..."? What was that for?
Why weave such blatant lies to keep me hopeful? Do you enjoy the feeling the power you hold over me? Is that it? Well, you won't be feeling it anymore, this I can guarantee. I've finally seen through you. I thought you were were a good person but it turned out I couldn't have been more wrong. I'm sorry I ever thought you were worth waiting for. Seng Chee was right. You turned out to be a "lala" after all...